Mangy Mutt, that I love
by Etern
Summary: There were few things in life that Draco Malfoy hated...Well, actaully there were a lot of things, but that doesn't matter. What matters is that the monster must die...


Mangy Mutt, that I love.

BY: Etern

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and characters, they belong to the talented J.K. Rowling.

* * *

There were few things in life that Draco Malfoy hated.

…or wait, never mind. There were actually far too many things that Draco Malfoy hated. He couldn't help it that they were simply below his standards and a constant agitator.

Public restrooms, hand blow driers, banana pudding, vacuum cleaners, Ron Weasley, Harry Potter, Harry Potter's face, Ron Weasley's hair, that weird looking guinea pig one of the Professors owned, Transfiguration, the Divine, Gryffindors, lions, goddamn Colin Creevey, Pansy, Death Eaters, really pointy hats, and bushy haired buck toothed Mudbloods were just a few of the things he hated.

…well, except for maybe the last one. Said bushy haired buck toothed Mudblood was indeed an agitator to him, but not all the time. In fact, sometimes she could be quite the…stimulator. It really all depended on what happened certain days and the things she did.

For instance, he hated her on Mondays for waking him up for classes but then immediately loved her again as soon as she kissed him. He hated her at the office because she always had to look so damn tempting, and he could not make out with her during work and he loved her just the same for looking so damn tempting in the first place.

He hated how OCD she could be at times, yet appreciated how she managed to always keep him in order. She even color coded his socks—yes, it was indeed that bad, although he didn't mind. He could wear what ever color suited his mood, he liked to think. It made the OCD thing more bearable, really.

But if there was one thing that he will always hate, no matter her influence or not, it would have to be the insidious thing known to the muggle world as "pet stores". He really didn't see the point of them either. Why did muggles feel the need to have to showcase their ridiculous animals? Really, the wizarding world had much better things to choose from.

After all, what did muggle pets—an all pets in general—do but lay around, poop, and get in the way. In Draco's perfect opinion, at least. And a Malfoy was rarely ever wrong. Ever. Actually they never were, he amended, they were just tricked into thinking something else. Yes, that was it.

Ahem, anyway, so he really hated pet stores, and not even his muggle loving girlfriend could make the animals look any cuter as she all but dragged him into the store. Well, he supposed that she could make it look better if she decided to wear animal printed lingerie—which he had seen in the window display of a store they had passed—but he doubted that she'd ever wear anything like that.

But still, the fantasies… they were almost enough to take the pain of being in the forsaken pet store away. Almost.

"Oh, look at that kitten Draco! Isn't she just precious?" Hermione was gushing, and Draco, who was a little taken aback by how…girly his love was being almost gagged.

"If you want to call it that, sure," he grumbled in reply, looking at said 'precious' kitty in time to see it jump in its litter box to create something even more "precious". Great.

"What are we doing in here in the first place?" he sighed, glaring after his girlfriend as she only grabbed his hand and guided him further into the depths of hell—er, the store. The depths of the store. Right.

"I just want to look," she replied lightly, seemingly ignorant to her boyfriend's complaints, which Draco knew very damn well that she wasn't. Of course he had to have found himself a girlfriend who took the greatest pleasure in torturing him. Of course.

Sometimes, he hated her, like right now. But of course that feeling rarely lasted. As soon as she bent down to look at another oh so adorable animal in another cage he got a right good view of her rear, right there looking so fine in front of him, and he immediately fell in love with her all over again.

Damn sexy Mudbloods and their too perfect rears!

"Where are the snakes?" he complained as she gushed over yet another kitten, this one taking amusement in chasing its tail. He sneered at it. It looked up and meowed at him. Damn little ass—

"I don't think they have them here, and thank god! Snakes are gross."

He turned his glare from the kitten to her in an instant, a look of aggravation crossing his face. "What do you mean 'snake are gross?!' You do remember that I was in Slytherin, don't you?"

She simply looked back over her shoulder at him and raised a brow, dark eyes gleaming. "Yeah, and?"

He could only scowl, and scowl even more at her laughter at his expense.

"Why am I with you again?" he angrily said, glaring down at her as she laughed yet _again _and wrapped her arm around his waist in a hug, leaning up to place a soft kiss on his cheek.

Immediately, despite himself under her touch he softened, and the scowl fell from his lips until he was only glaring, albeit lightly.

"Cuz that's why," she smiled up at him, "and you can't live without me here pestering you!"

Yes, he thought, even as he sighed heavily and wrapped her in his arms. Yes, that was true.

He almost sighed as she pulled away from him to press her hands back to the glass of the display case, missing her warmth already. Yet another tally mark on his 'reasons to really hate her sometimes' list.

She had moved on to cooing at the dogs, and he could only roll his eyes in annoyance and occupy his time by glaring at all the males that dared look at Hermione, and scowling at just the store in general. He wished he could take his wand out and play around with magic but knew that Hermione would beat him mercilessly for scaring the customs. And of course, the animals too. He could _never _forget them with the way that Hermione was raving about them.

"That one looks so sad! I wonder why? Oh look, the price is lowered for him…Is that because no one wants him?"

Draco peeked around Hermione to see the dog she was currently lamenting over only to see what looked to be a mutt staring back at him. It really was a cute dog, to anyone that wasn't Draco Malfoy at least. It had the brightest brown eyes that held a light of intelligence beyond its years and kind, and looked to be a mutt of the beagle variety. It was a small little lap dog and, unlike most dogs he looked at, did not quiver under his gaze. Instead it wagged its tail.

"Hermione I think the dog has mental issues," he commented, "It won't keep its tongue in its mouth and its getting way too excited from my death glare. No wonder no one wants it."

He looked at her in time to see her scowl at him, and to see the spark of determination in her eyes. Uh oh. He froze. He knew that look! It was the same one she always gave him when she ranted about S.P.E.W! Oh f—

"Well _I _want him!" she sniffed, and he groaned earning yet another glare from her.

"I so saw this coming… Hermione, we don't have room for a dog!"

She gave him an incredulous look. "Malfoy, we live in a _manor! _A manor! Don't you think that that would be enough room for one little dog?"

"…But this isn't just any dog. This is that dog."

"How is he different than any others!" she exclaimed, throwing her arms up. Draco looked back to the puppy they were debating over in time to see him lick his…special area.

"He's uncouth!" he exclaimed, looking crossly at the urgently licking dog. "I mean look at him, doing that in public! God, it's like Weasley in dog form! No. No way Hermione, have I refused to buy that…thing. I'd rather have a poodle."

"Of course _you_ would!" she snorted, "they're as standoffish and high class and pampered and pretty as you are!"

"I am not _pretty_! I'm devilishly handsome."

"…Anyway, I'm getting that dog, whether you want me too or not."

"No you aren't! It's my house—"

"Oh, don't you dare use that excuse! It's all but mine too you ninny, considering I practically live there! In fact, I even decorated our room!"

"The house is still under my name!"

"…Draco Malfoy, don't make me hate you. Are you going to be that much of an asshole about this? Because you know if we don't get that dog, you aren't getting _any_."

Despite himself, Draco felt panic set in. "What?! That's preposterous Hermione! Over a _dog_?! A mutt at that! A freaking Weasley-like dog—"

"Yes Draco. Over a dog. Now let's go ask the lady at the counter to see our new pet and give us his papers, shall we?"

"B-But—Hey, no Hermione Granger you bitch where are you going! Get back here—"

But she was already at the counter, smiling at the woman. With wounded pride and a dark scowl, he threw one last deadly glance at what would be their new puppy and marched after her.

--

One week in, and he hated what he dubbed so lovingly 'the monster' already.

Not only had the mutt almost chewed his wand up, but he peed all over his paper, chewed up his best shoes, got white fur all over his traditional black robes (what else does he wear!?) and, to top it all off, was stealing Hermione away from him.

He was staring to think that she loved that damn dog more than him.

He watched every night as she groomed him lovingly, stroking him in such a way that made it very…painful to watch. She kissed him, she let him sleep at the foot of the bed, sometimes even between them. She coddled him, cooked him special meals, gave him so many treats he was already getting fat, and took him everywhere with her.

There were no longer private moments between us. No longer just Draco and Hermione. Now, there always was Draco, Hermione and Dragon.

Oh yes, she had even named the stupid thing after him.

What an honor, really. Yet another reason to hate her. His name meant dragon dammit, and this dog could not have taken it from him!

As another week passed of the same treatment by Hermione and torture for Draco, he decided that no matter what he had to act to get rid of it, and he had to act fast.

He was considering taking it to the Ministry one day and letting it lose, just to see who would be dumb enough to take it. Or he could tie it to a post somewhere and hope for the best. God he wished he could just flush it down the toilet like a goldfish.

Now there was a great pet, a goldfish. They were low maintenance, quiet, and they couldn't destroy all your objects and steal your girlfriend. Maybe once Dragon was gone he'd replace him with a goldfish?

He'd think about it.

Until then Hermione and Dragon seemed oblivious to his plotting. Every night he would watch as Hermione fed the monster extra morsels of food and try to think of a plan. He had once even called Potter asking him—not begging, Malfoys don't beg—to take the damn dog but Harry had laughed at his plight and promptly hung up on him. Prick. Maybe he should walk Dragon by his house and make him pee on his front door. That would at least put the damn animal to some use for him.

Three weeks in, and he was still suffering and still planning. He tried to make his sulking slash brooding slash being a git sessions private, but eventually Hermione began to notice.

One night, after feeding the monster, she plopped down on his lap where he sat in an armchair by the fire and demanded to know what was wrong.

"Oh you know," he responded bitterly, "Just watching a dog salivate over my girlfriend. Nothing big. Not a big deal at all."

Hermione raised a brow at him and bit her lip, and he narrowed his eyes at her. Oh, he knew that she was trying not to laugh. For a second he considered pushing her off his lap, but before he could she was grabbing his hand and tenderly kissing it. And for a moment the contact that he felt he had not gotten in weeks, since the monster arrived, made him soften. But only for an instant.

"You know he's just a dog Draco."

Oi. He scowled at her, snatching his hand away. "I know that," he sneered, "I just think that you should stop giving it so much damn attention!"

She stared at him for a moment, blinking, before her face broke into a mischievous smile. Ok, now he was really thinking of pushing her off his lap dammit.

"Why Draco Malfoy, are you jealous of a _dog?_" she grinned, and he shot daggers at her.

"NO," he growled, "I'm just concerned for our relationship and your mental health. You're way too attached to that little monster."

"I am not!" she defended, still smiling, "I just want to give him some love and care. He was abused, did you know that?" Her smile fell a little, turning sad as she reached for Draco's hand to hold. "Before he came to the pet store he was abused by his owners. They used to beat him, let the other dogs hurt him. I guess… I just want to make up for that. Make him feel good, you know?"

He was not going to cave, he said to himself, there was no way he was suddenly going to understand, or feel bad for the monster. It still chewed everything, was stealing his girlfriend…

"There is a thing called over loving you know," he coolly replied, "You'll kill him with love."

She rolled her eyes and laughed a little at that, squeezing his hand. "There's no way you can kill someone with love Draco!"

"And how do you know?" he challenged, and she smiled, leaning up to kiss him gently.

She met his eyes with a smile as she pulled away, holding his hand to her heart. "Because silly, if that were true you'd be dead by now."

--

It was a Friday night, and he was alone, for the first time, with the monster. The monster was currently lounging on _his _armchair as it watched with brown eyes as he paced the room, muttering to himself.

Draco Malfoy, for all his courage, could not help but feel nervous. Tonight was the night he had been waiting for for what felt like forever now.

He stopped in his pacing for a second to look down at his outfit again, taking in the black tux. Luckily none of Dragon's hair had managed to get to it yet, since Draco had been avoiding the beast like he carried the next killer plague. Not that he didn't avoid him anyway, but still, this time more so.

Speaking of said beast, as he was smoothing his hair down yet again with his hands the creature decided to let out a little yap for attention, making Draco's skin crawl as he turned to scowl at it. The damn thing didn't even blink, just wagged its tail.

"God, why don't you notice looks of death!" he complained at it, earning him yet another yap and a tail shake. It was almost as though it were mocking him. Stupid little—

"Look monster, this night's very important, so don't piss me off, ok? You know that woman who you're stealing from me, mutt? Yeah, well tonight I'm finally proposing to her. So you better scram before she gets here."

Dragon just blinked at him. Draco narrowed his eyes. "You're planning something, aren't you? Listen you bloody little vermin—"

He strolled over to tower over Dragon, forgetting momentarily his desire to keep his suit clean. "I already don't know how to ask her as it is, but it needs to be perfect, the best way possible to make her happy. And if you're going to get in the way I'll have no problem in kicking you out on the streets, you hear?"

Another goddamn tail wag. Draco swore that one day he would cut it off. "Listen to me monster! This—"

Reaching into his pocket he pulled out the black little jewelry box and held it up for the monster to see. "This is proof that she's mine, not yours, got it? And you can never have it! Stupid bloody little mutt—"

He should have seen it coming. He really should have. By now Draco knew that Dragon liked to steal almost anything, especially things he knew were of value. So when he had held the box right there, dangling by those teeth, it should have only seemed natural that Dragon would grab hold of it and run.

And in fact, that was exactly what the monster did.

"Oh fuck!"

Draco could only watch in horror as the box was ripped from his hands with a little growl, hoping to god that the dog wouldn't figure out how to open and it get to the ring inside as he began his desperate chase around the house after the criminal animal, cursing it all the way.

"I always hated you and now I have an actual reason to tell her! You're just a mutt you—oh god don't drop it!—slow down dammit, I'm not young—this is pathetic!—I HATE you!—want a biscuit?—I'll stop calling you mutt if I can just have it back!!"

It didn't take long for Draco to not only lose the dog, but run out of breath. It was after all a mansion, dammit. Never before had he cursed his wealth until now. He hated mansions, but not as much as he hated dogs. Dragon in general. When he got hold of that little—

But it was too late now. Every ounce of blood in his body froze at the sound of the heavy door opening and closing, followed by Hermione's voice calling that she was home.

Oh for the love of—

He was making his way to the foyer as fast as he could when he saw it—Dragon, also on his way to the foyer to greet his mistress. And he still had the jewelry box clamped in his jaws.

"Bloody hell!" he all but screamed, picking up his speed.

From there it was an all out race. Draco was just behind Dragon when they slammed through the door into the foyer, Hermione's shocked face not registering as Dragon came to a stop at her feet, ready to greet her—

--When Draco decided to try to tackle him.

The result?

It was not too lovely. Draco, forgetting that Dragon was in front of Hermione, ended up tackling his fiancé-to-be instead as Dragon—the cunning monster—moved to the side. In a clamber of limbs, curses from Draco and screams from Hermione, Draco found himself staring down into Hermione's shocked, wide eyed face. He immediately fastened on a sheepish smile.

"Draco, what—"

"Er…You know, I really can explain…"

"You can start by getting off of me!"

Oh shit, he gulped. She looked angry. How could he propose to her now? He thought miserably as he moved to the side and allowed her to sit up, eying him like he was some kind of a freak or something.

"I didn't think you'd be this excited to see me," she commented, crossing her arms and raising a brow at him. "Now what's going—"

It was not Draco who tackled her this time, but the monster that had gotten them there in the first place. Dragon jumped excitedly onto his mistress's lap, opening his mouth to bark—

--and out fell the jewelry box, right onto Hermione's lap.

"Hm?" she muttered, eyeing it as she casually picked it up, not seeing her boyfriend's frantic expression. "What's this?"

She went to open it when Draco reached out to grab her wrist, stopping her and earning her attention.

"Draco what is it?" she blinked, taking in his pale face, "It's just a jewel—"

She stopped with a gasp, her eyes growing wide as she looked between him and the box, him and the box and Dragon. He wanted to smack his forehead. Or strangle Dragon.

"D-Draco…?"She whispered and he looked away, rubbing his neck in embarrassment. "What i-is this…?"

"Er, well…" he started, and then sighed, looking down, away from her eyes. "I had planned to give it to you more…elaborately but well…"

Without further delay she opened the box to see a princess cut diamond ring gleaming back at her. If she had not already been sitting her legs would have given out. She looked back at her boyfriend with a shocked expression and wet eyes.

"D-Draco…what…is this really…?"

It was Dragon who answered for him, with one large bark.

Draco, smiling sheepishly, looked at her with twinkling eyes. "Yeah, what he said, it really is. So Hermione…"

He took the box from her gently, taking the ring out. Beneath them Dragon was salivating like crazy. "I know this isn't the best way to ask you to marry me but…well you anyway? I mean I love you and all, so you have a reason to say yes…"

Hermione did not look at him for a moment. She looked down, down into the eyes of the puppy who had brought her such a gift and let the tears fall down her face. When she looked back up into Draco's anxious eyes she was smiling the brightest smile she had ever worn.

"What are you talking about? It was simply the perfect way to ask me! So thoughtful…"

He could not help but glower slightly at her. "Your answer Mione…?"

She rolled her eyes through her tears and laughed, throwing her arms around him in a tight embrace.

"Well, with such a unique proposal, how could I say no? My answer is yes Draco!" she whispered in her ear, and he held her so tightly to him that he knocked the air from her lungs, his face relaxing in relief.

"Thank god," he whispered, before pulling back to bestow her with a passionate kiss that she ardently returned, whispering 'I love you' against his lips. He had never felt happier…

When they pulled away and he slipped the ring on her finger he glanced over to see Dragon watching them with a big dopey grin on his face, and for once it looked cute. For once, the dog in general looked cute. Sure, he was annoying. Sure, he was loud and gross at times, but after the perfect proposal.

Smiling, Draco looked to the mutt and opened his arms to him as in invitation for a hug.

"Mangy mutt, I love you for now."

And Hermione's laughter blended with Draco's cries as he was completely licked to death.

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